Have I really forgiven? : Harbouring unforgiveness consciously & unconsciously

I had a back and forth with the Holy Spirit this week, it was about something I deliberately decided not to do. And this inaction of mine was a pointer that I was harbouring unforgiveness and some level of anger in my heart towards someone.

I remember clearly it was in the early hours of the morning during the week when I had this back and forth with the Holy Spirit. I was trying to justify my inaction or you could say action. Then the Holy Spirit just said three words to me that reset my mindset, reset my heart and how I felt towards this person.

Those were probably the three most powerful words I may have heard all week because the way it jolted me out of my position to act quickly, it just had to be the power of the Holy Spirit.

I was almost sure that unforgiveness was something I wouldn’t struggle with again but then again I am reminded about how fallible the human nature is, and the very need and essence to die to flesh daily. And that is the very reason we need the Holy Spirit every single time with us on this journey of faith.

I strongly believe that the Holy Spirit is our customized helper who has been designated to help us through our unique faith journeys

He has been given to us, lives inside us to advice us, guide us on the best ways to handle things per time. That is why I always advocate for an experiential knowledge of Christ because what the Holy Spirit could prescribe for me may be totally different from what He’d advice you to do per time.

Now back to the matter of unforgiveness; it is an expectation from God for us, His children to forgive every single person that hurts us, no matter how humongous we think it might be. His word tells us to, “get rid of all forms of bitterness, rage, anger, harsh words, slander and all types of evil behaviour but instead be tender hearted, forgiving one another just as God has forgiven us through Jesus Christ” – Ephesians 4:31-32.

Jesus Christ is the link here guys, it is through Him God has forgiven us and it is also through Him we are able to forgive the unforgivable. Jesus Christ makes forgiveness for us possible. It is because of Him, I am able to forgive. Just in case you are not friends with Him yet, please make Him your friend by saying the prayers here, then ask Him to help you forgive.

The above bible verses helps us to identify when we have unforgiveness harboured in our hearts towards an individual. Sometimes we say we have forgiven someone but in reality we have not and other times we are just clueless that we harbour hate and unforgiveness towards this person. Therefore to really know if we have really forgiven someone, these things will be evident:

• Bitterness in the heart towards that person or group of people
• Rage & anger at the mere thought or sight of the person or group of people
• Use of harsh words to describe the person or when speaking with the person
• Using horrible adjectives to describe the person.
• And ultimately thinking anything evil about or against the person.

And ofcourse to really know if we have truly forgiven those who hurt us, our demeanour towards them will be tenderhearted with the absence of any of the evil listed above.

I believe that as believers when we start to seek ways that please and make God happy always, forgiving may just be a little bit easier with His help. Just as we seek for ways to make the people we love happy, in the same way and even beyond we should always seek to make God happy with us. Moreso, recognizing that unforgiveness displeases Him is sure one of the ways to start to make Him happy.

In my opinion, I was not exactly doing anything bad, I was not plotting anything evil against this person. But the Holy Spirit would make me understand that my silence spoke volumes about the anger I had inside of me. I love the Holy Spirit!

So How can we truly forgive everyone and bask in the joy of the Lord?

Recognize it: It would be great for us to always walk in humility as we walk in faith with Christ. I could have chosen to be prideful and in control when the Holy Spirit convicted me of my sin this week, in fact I was! That was why I was trying to justify my actions. But I am thankful for the Holy Spirit who was patient enough to converse with me. I love Him!

Talk About it: In this case of mine this week, I had the conversation with the Holy Spirit who ultimately searches the hearts of men, our intents and is able to discern motives behind actions. So He absolutely is the best option to have a conversation with instead of gossipping about them or bottling it all up. And other times, I find that having conversations with these people that may have hurt me. asking them questions to understand why they did what they did helps a lot.

So my dears, have conversations that are geared towards reaching a resolve and ultimately forgiving.

Ask for Help from the Holy Spirit: And times when it just seems like it is impossible to let go and forgive, ask the Holy Spirit,our present help. He listens and wants to help us. Engage Him!